WHO SHOULD APOLOGIZE IN A RELATIONSHIP THE MAN OR THE WOMAN?

          

First of all, let’s look into the meaning of the word “APOLOGY”:

Apology is an expression of once regret, either written or spoken, showing remorse or sadness for performing an absurd or abysmal act.

It is also an acknowledgment expressing regret or asking for pardon for a fault or offense committed.

Now let’s look into the word “RELATIONSHIP”:

Relationship is a “CONNECTION” between two or more people. You may say, it is the way two things are connected to each other.

In the primitive era, as we have read about and also heard  in some parts of the world, women were made to believe that men are the head  which is definitely true, they respected them no matter what their spouses does they were ready to apologize even they (women) were not at fault.

The men on the other side feeling like a god, believes since they are the head, they should or must not apologize to their women when ever they wrong their women.

Let me share this true life story with you:

There is this couple, who had this particular problem on who should apologize. Almost every week, they must fight, quarrel etc. These  are couples who vowed in church in front of hundreds of people, to love and to hold each other, but why this disgusting act? When ever the man offends the woman, the woman will be expecting an apology from the man. When ever the woman offends the man, he will be expecting an apology from the woman. Every blessed week they kept on fighting like children. Do you know what happened later? They (the couples) finally concluded that they don’t love each anymore. Finally they started having extra marital affairs.

Now whose fault is it? After reading the above little story, what answer can u give to your self for the question, whose fault is it, is it the man’s or the woman’s?

Like I earlier stated in the meaning of the word RELATIONSHIP, it is a CONNECTION. I don’t know how you understand the word CONNECTION in a relationship.   

Let’s look at the things that prevents spouses from apologizing in relationships:

1.       Ego

2.       Pride

EGO:

Firstly, what is the meaning of EGO? 

It is the part of you that defines itself as a personality, separates itself from the outside world, and considers itself a separate entity from the rest of nature and the cosmos. Perhaps necessary for survival in some evolutionary bygone, in modern times it leads only to misanthropic beliefs and delusion.

Psycologist says it is the conscious part of the mind that is responsible for thinking and understanding. Never allow yourself to feel superior to anyone, if this happens, EGO is at work. Never allow yourself to feel inferior to anyone, if this happens, EGO is at work, Vice versa.  EGO is a key tool in destroying any relationship, a man or a woman that is egotistic will sure destroy  his or her relationship if he or she can not be humble and say “PLEASE I AM SORRY”, when this four letter word is said, any mountain in that relationship will and must collapse.

 

According to Albert Einstein’s formular :   EGO = 1/knowledge. The more the knowledge, the lesser the ego, the lesser the  knowledge, the more the ego.

Ego is very bad in a relationship, its not hard to say ”PLEASE MY LOVE, I AM SORRY FOR WHAT I SAID” or “I AM SORRY FOR WHAT I DID”. But your ego will not let you apologize. My dear Man and Woman, do not allow ego to make you loose a relationship you have spent years and maybe money to build. As far as you love your partner so much, immediately you realize you have offended him or her, my dear Woman, my dear Man, you have to apologize for peace to reign in your home.

PRIDE:

 Let’s look at the meaning of the word PRIDE.  It is a high or inordinate opinion of one's own dignity, importance, merit, or superiority, whether as cherished in the mind or as displayed in bearing, conduct, etc.

 It is also the state or feeling of being proud. It is a becoming or dignified sense of what is due to oneself or one's position or character; self-respect.     With a negative connotation pride refers to an inflated sense of one's personal status or accomplishments, often used synonymously with hubris.

Now listen to this:

In some families, or relationships, you will find out that women are financially buoyant than their men. Why is it so? Let me put you on. God in heaven is not a stupid God, he has his own reasons for making some women financially buoyant  than their men. As I will always tell my friends and other people, women are the pillars of every relationship, that was the reason God created them as “Help Mate”. You will see in today’s society, some Women uses their money to oppress their men, which is wrong, that is pride at work. When ever their men complains of a certain wrong behavior from them, they will start shouting. Instead of realizing their mistake and apologizing  so that  peace will  reign, pride at work. They feel to big to apologize they will say something like “after all I provide for the family”. It is very wrong, it may lead to a bad end. Women no matter how richer or influencial you are than your partner, try to be humble and apologies to your partner, because Pride goes before a fall. Do not forget what God does to the proud and what he (God) also does to the humble according to James 4:6.

This does not go for the women alone, it also goes for the men. Most men are full of pride in their relationship which is very bad. As a man, spice up your relationship by showing humility to your woman, you don’t have to say after all I am the head of the family, so no need to apologize. I say a big NO to that, you have to apologize when ever there is a problem between both of you, drop your pride and save your relationship or marriage.

There is no big deal in apologizing, it does not take away your certificate from you, it does not take away you achievements, it can never take away your future, it will always give you peace, happiness, joy and even wisdom. Do you know that when ever you are humble in your relationship with your partner, you must learn one new thing? Try it and see for your self, it is a tactical thing that only you will discover.

Now who should apologize in a relationship, the man or the woman?

You should know that you don’t pay in other to be able to apologize. Do not say “I had no money to pay for apology subscription”. It is free, and it must come from your heart.  So you have no excuse for not apologizing to your partner when ever you are wrong.

Relationship is not all about one person, but it has to do with both parties involved. Do not wait for the other to apologize first, be the first to apologize and save your relationship. You will see couples quarrelling and the man will be waiting for the woman to apologize, the woman also will be waiting for the man to apologize. Common, be the first to apologize, anybody can apologize and save the relationship.

Come to think of it, what if non of you does not apologize, what do you think will happen to your beloved relationship or marriage?

Apology is not specifically meant for a man only nor a woman only, but it is meant for both men and women.

I will love to see your comments on this topic and we will discuss more.